Assignment Report: Research for Local Social Agency to Incorporate into Pamphlet on Expectant Fathers’ Transition to Parenthood

This Assignment Report will entail information that will allow a local social agency to create a pamphlet on expectant fathers’ transition to parenthood. More specifically, what changes can the father anticipate after the baby arrives will be provided.

The birth of a child is indeed a joyous occasion for both mother and father. However, there are times the married couple could have thoughts that such a change in current conditions could bring despair upon the marriage. The good news is that “for most new parents, the arrival of a baby does not cause significant marital strain” (Berk, 2009, p 567). The bad news is that although a mother’s bonding has been assumed for many decades, it is not until recent decades that we have started thinking of a father’s bond for the newborn (Berens, n.d.). To remove this dreadful news for the father, there are many techniques that can be achieved “to be more inclusive of dads … and to address relationship changes post kids …” (Berens, n.d., para. 9). In the following, varying techniques for the father will be displayed in hopes for a better educated transition to fatherhood.

The most important tool for any father to have is that he must keep the lines of communication open with his partner. “Talking with your partner can help you both air your feelings about the big life changes ahead” (Downs, n.d., para. 7). Moreover, when there are open lines of communication, the father will become sensitive to his partner and his listening capabilities will improve. It is not only the sensitivity of the father at hand, but also inclusive for the partner. Both the father and partner can incorporate the Deep Democracy concept for their communication process. When both parties are discussing feelings, opinions, and disagreements, the Deep Democracy approach will allow each person “to express [themselves] … and ... have … feelings understood” (Berens, n.d., para.11). To incorporate the Deep Democracy concept, the father should write a letter to himself that describes his relationship within himself, and to that of his partner (Berens, n.d.). Below are the items that should be included in this self letter:

1. Describe what your wants are for being a new parent.

2. If you’re amiss of wants for being a new parent, then describe how you intend to support yourself.

3. Be sure to list and describe items such as your appreciation for your partner, and what you envision the togetherness for both as your baby enters the world.

The father can also have his partner complete a same self letter, and each can exchange with one another. “Put your letter and the one your [partner] wrote in a place where you’ll be able to access them again easily, in case you need to be reminded of your connection with each other and yourself; and need some support in navigating the challenges of parenthood” (Berens, n.d., para. 22).

Another important tool for the newly transitioned father to incorporate would be the time allotted for his partner and newborn. “As a new father, balancing your roles as parent, partner, and (possibly) bread-winner is tough … [let alone that] you suddenly have a lot to do and a lot less time to do it in” (Downs, n.d., para. 8). It is very important that the father jump in and help his partner at every avenue possible with newborn. This includes helping your partner with “giving baths, changing diapers, or rocking your baby to sleep” (Downs, n.d., para. 9). If the father is rocking the baby to sleep, most often it is a signal response due to the baby crying. The father can utilize the “lift the baby to the shoulder and rock or walk [method]” (Berk, 2009, p 136).

It is also good to remember not to feel guilty about leaving your partner and newborn to go to work, because “you’re fulfilling a key role by providing for your family” (Downs, n.d., para. 11). Depending on your financial situation, you may also be approved for 12 weeks of unpaid leave. However, “the federal government mandates only 12 weeks of unpaid leave for employees in companies with at least 50 workers” (Berk, 2009, p 117). So the father will need to check with his employer to see what options are afforded to him.

There are many techniques available for the new father, and by keeping the lines of communication open can lessen the burdens one may experience. It is also important for the new father to “stay positive and work with your partner as a team” (Downs, n.d., para. 31). Remember, at any time you may be experiencing guilt, anguish, or despair, the local social agency is here to assist you. Your local social agency is a wealth of information and resources; all at the tip of your fingers.